Secrets and Lies (#20)

For years, I was part of the notorious Airing-their-Dirty-Laundry-in-Public gang. We terrorized the good burghers of Brockville by spraying their drying laundry with a patented mixture of purified tar and fishheads. I was caught and in exchange for immunity and witness protection, named names. The lifeless body of the last gang member was recently found in his cell, nose clamped with a clothespin and mouth stuffed with a Downy sheet. Finally, I can resume life as Delphine L’Amoreuse.

[Author's note: I have slightly exceeded the 56-word limit, but I didn't post on so many days this month that I figure I can exceed the daily word count with impunity. Plus if you report me, I will go after your laundry.]